In the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful

The great status of parents is well-documented in Islam; there are numerous Quranic verses and ahadith commanding us to be good to them.

In fact, a running theme throughout the Quran is that Allah (swt) mentions servitude to parents immediately after servitude to Him, such is their importance.

For example, in Surah al-Isra, verse 23-24, Allah (swt) says: 

And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small."

In another verse, Surah an-Nisa, verse 36, Allah (swt) says:

"Worship God and join not any partners with Him, and be kind to your parents..." 

And so on. 

Therefore, being good to parents is an obligation for all children and a Divinely given right they have over us. Our parents are a source of great reward and blessings for us, and so we should be eager to please them and earn their good favour for success in this life and the next insha'Allah. 

And so here are ten simple ways to honour your parents every day...

1. Spending quality time together

Giving your time and undivided attention to your parents is one of the most important ways in which you can honour them. No matter how busy or hectic your life is, spending quality time with them on a regular basis will make them feel special and important (especially if you don't live with them).

And if you can't visit your parents in person, be sure to call and message them often to ask how they are and to ask if they need anything. 

Note: When spending time with your parents, always try to give your full and undivided attention to them. Being glued to your phone whilst they are trying to have a conversation with you is disrespectful and will undoubtedly make them feel as if they are not important to you. 

2. Making sincere dua

Always remember your parents in your duas (which you should strive to make on a daily basis).  Specific examples of duas you can make include asking Allah (swt) to grant them good health, forgiveness, strong imaan, and a long and prosperous life.

Also remember to ask Allah (swt) to ease any difficulties that they may be facing and to protect them from all harm.  

There are also powerful Quranic duas as follows:

1. Surah Al-Israh, Verse 24

Transliteration: Rabbi irhamhuma kama rabbayanee sagheera

"And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small."

2. Surah Nuh, Verse 28

Transliteration: Rabbi ighfir lee waliwalidayyawaliman dakhala baytiya mu/minan walilmu/mineena walmu/minatiwala tazidi aththalimeena illatabaran

"My Lord, forgive me and my parents and whoever enters my house a believer and the believing men and believing women. And do not increase the wrongdoers except in destruction.”

3. Surah Ibrahim, Verse 41

Transliteration: Rabbana ghfir li wa li wallidayya wa lil Mu’mineena yawma yaqumul hisaab

Translation: “Our Lord! Forgive me and my parents, and (all) the believers on the Day when the reckoning will be established.”

3. Expressing your love

Don't be shy to tell your parents how much you love them and to show your affection with hugs and kisses. Letting them know how important they are in your life and how much you appreciate everything they do for you is a simple and beautiful way of honouring their presence, and will surely make them very happy. 

4. Speaking with kindness

Allah (swt) has commanded us to speak to our parents with kindness and humilty; it is not permitted to raise your voice or be harsh in any way with them. If you are feeling angry about something, take time out to calm down before addressing your parents in a polite manner. If you have made a mistake and hurt your parents' feelings, be quick to apologise and show genuine remorse for your actions.

5. Helping with daily tasks

Do your best to help your parents with everyday tasks such as grocery shopping, cleaning the house, or taking them to appointments without them having to ask you.  Just an hour of your time a few times a week can make a huge difference to your parents and help them feel valued and appreciated. You should do this regardless of whether you live with them not (if you live with them, then you can insha'Allah do more to help out).

6. Showing empathy 

Empathy is key to connecting with your parents on a deeper level and making them feel valued, especially if they are going through any difficulties. For example, they may be suffering from ill health, have financial worries, or be anxious about their (or your) future. Listen to how they feel and offer words of comfort and practical help where possible.

More than anything, let them know you are there for them no matter what and they can call upon you day and night if they need to; this is their right and they should never be made to feel like a burden or a nuisance. 

7. Being patient

You should always do your best to be patient with your parents, especially as they approach old age. They may suffer from health-related issues, have side-effects from medication, be prone to forgetfulness and become stubborn - much like a toddler.

And just as they put up with your tantrums and mood swings as a child, you too need to understand them better and be patient with them. This is easier said than done at times, but they are your parents and it is their right to be treated with dignity, respect and patience. Moreover, there is a great reward from Allah (swt) for those who are patient. 

8. Giving charity

One of the best ways to honour parents is to do things that benefit them, such as giving charity on their behalf.  This can be done whilst they are still alive or if they have passed away, and you will also get the reward of the charity too insha'Allah. The same applies to making Hajj on their behalf if they are unable to go themselves because of old age or sickness which is incurable.

Sadaqa jaariya (continuous charity) is a beautiful form of charity that offers ongoing rewards for both the donor and recipient in this world and the hereafter. Examples include the building of water wells, educating children and building masaajid. Even being a good and upright Muslim is a form of sadaqa jaariya as your parents will be rewarded for your good deeds and conduct insha'Allah. 

9. Being obedient

A huge part of honouring your parents is tending to their needs, being obedient to them and generally serving them well. If they ask you to do something, try your best to fulfil their request quickly so they are not compelled to keep asking you over and over again. Similarly, if they ask you not to do something, you are obliged to obey them.

The only exception to obeying them is if they ask you to do something which Allah (swt) has forbidden e.g. breaking family ties. 

10. Giving gifts

Giving gifts to your parents is a wonderful way of showing your love and appreciation to them. Indeed, it's a Sunnah of the Prophet (saw) who said, "Exchange gifts, as that will lead to increasing your love for one another." (Bukhari)

Gifts don't need to be expensive - you can do things like baking a cake, making a piece of wall art or giving flowers/plants you have grown yourself - it really is the thought that counts! But you should try to present the gift in a beautiful manner, as the effort you have gone through will surely make your parents feel special. 

Remember, gifts shouldn't just be reserved for occasions like Eid; rather you should try and give gifts to your parents often to increase the love between you insha'Allah. 

And if your beloved parents are no longer with you...

There are still things you can do to benefit them insha'Allah as follows:

• Give continuous charity on their behalf 
• Make dua and seek forgiveness for them every day 
• Complete any obligatory missed fasts on their behalf 
• Perform Hajj on their behalf (if you have completed your obligatory Hajj)
• Pay off any debts they may have had (including missed/outstanding Zakat)
• Stay in touch with their relatives and friends and treat them well

The Prophet (saw) said,"When a man dies, his deeds come to an end except for three things: Sadaqah Jariyah (ceaseless charity); a knowledge which is beneficial, or a virtuous descendant who prays (makes dua) for him (for the deceased)." (Muslim)

As we can see, honouring our parents is actually not difficult to do if you have the right intention insha'Allah. Good manners, respect and time don't cost anything, but can go a long way in pleasing our parents and ultimately Allah (swt).  

On a final note, we should remember that although we are commanded to honour both our parents by obeying them and treating them well, the status of mothers is three times greater than that of the father and therefore deserves a special mention. 

In a well-known hadith,  a man came to the Prophet and said: "O Messenger of Allah! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me? He replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So he replied: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So he replied: "Then your father." (Bukhari and Muslim)

Indeed, pleasing one's mother is something we should all strive hard for, as Islam tells us that Jannah lies at our mother's feet.

As already mentioned, the mother’s rights are greater than those of the father, and the duty to take care of her increases as she grows older and weaker. Therefore, always keep this in mind and remember to make extra special efforts towards your mother, because she is your door to Jannah if you treat her well insha'Allah.